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Women Empowered

Forgiveness and Green Grass- the story of Christeena Mais

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BY LEANNE BENN

It was December 2007and at just 15 years old, Christeena Mais started her journey to live a new life in Canada. With all her years growing up in a rural area of St Andrew Jamaica, Canada was unlike anything she was accustomed to on the island. It was meant to be a chance for opportunity and for positive change because you know the grass is always greener on the other side.

Mais left her mother and her main support system to go live in Canada with her father and three other siblings, already settled with her dad. It was a world in which Mais’s father was a single father raising four children in a homely apartment. This change could be the reason to blame but over the years, her father took out his frustrations and struggles in life on Mais. She remembers the day specifically, Mais was still in high school, attending the Cedarbrae Collegiate Institute and she had just been accepted into York University in Toronto. Excited with the news Mais excitedly told her father, only to be met with the least enthusiastic response and a declaration of “who will support you on this journey?” Mais ‘s father had different goals for her, he wanted her to work to contribute to the household and to sponsor her mother to come to Canada because the burden on him was too much. This burden manifested itself in dark and destructive ways through mental and verbal abuse. This emotional abuse was, unfortunately, something Mias was used to from the time she moved to Canada but while wanting to pursue her own dreams.

Mais left Jamaica for a reason because as a child her stepfather sexually abused her but now she found herself in a darker situation. It wasn’t long before Mais was kicked out of her father’s house at 18 and told to fend for herself. Determined to make her situation work, she took out student loans, received help from her pastor at church and received financial support from her mother and uncles back in Jamaica. “Overall I figured out a way to start going to university and the reason why he kicked me out the first time was that he wanted me to work and help him and that wasn’t my goal.”

Almost at the end of her four year degree, Mais, decided to give her family situation another chance and moved in with her father once again, to show her other siblings who had left, that maybe this time things will change and maybe this time their family could be kept whole, but this was not the case and once again Mais was kicked out and found herself in this horrifying tornado of moving from place to place while trying to complete her degree. At this stage, Mais decided she would never speak to her father again.

With all these things against her Mais never quit and graduated and received her B.A Honours degree in Law and Society. Mais was always the cheerful person, the one giving back and volunteering all the while thinking of her homeland and ways in which she could contribute to the Jamaican community.  Her friends would remark at her cheerful outlook on life but Mais always responded by saying “If I were to write a book, you wouldn’t believe half of the things that I’ve went through.” After saying this more than enough times, Mais actually made the decision to write a book and to share her experiences with everyone. This book was all about forgiveness and is entitled “Forgiveness Heals All Wounds”

“I had the idea of writing a book from the first time my dad kicked me out,” Mais remarked, she also said that forgiving those that hurt her was the only way to heal her wounds.

“Whatever I went through it helped to build me and give me strength as a woman, it taught me how to communicate properly with people and how to fend for myself.”

“After releasing the book, I’ve spoken to many women even younger and older that went through similar situations or even worse and I just wanted to share my journey, to those that are not talking about it.”

Ultimately it was a painful family situation that led Mais to talk to her father again and to forgive him in order to heal herself and to grow as a person. While the journey has been difficult, Mais always felt the support and love from her mother who is still back in Jamaica and from her husband whom she met in Canada. Mais is now a published author as of December 2018. There is really something to be said from that first December Mais arrived in Canada to now and looking back Mais would never change anything about her journey because she would never be the person she is today.

Forgiveness Heals All Wounds had it’s official book launch March 2019 back in Jamaica at a local bookstore, and it is also available on Amazon and at Barnes & Nobel. Mais is looking to share her work and personal experiences here in Toronto with those who are willing to listen because sometimes the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.

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1 Comment

  1. Nordia Malcolm-Smith

    July 1, 2019 at 11:19 am

    Hi Christeena not sure if you remember me but i’m Rita best friend from Papine High School, i use to come by the house from time to time when you and your sister were just little girls.
    Girl i am super proud of you, continue to aim high, if i am this proud i can only imagine how your mom, grandma, aunts, cousins and other relatives are feeling,
    Happy birthday sweetheart and may the Lord continue to guide you on your journey.

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Women Empowered

Karen Samuels Giving the community the courage to share their stories

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By Sydnee Walcott

While killing two birds with one stone is challenging for some, one woman is defying those odds. 

Karen Samuels moved to Canada from Jamaica at the age of three. At a young age, it wouldn’t have been easy for her to describe the transition from one country to another. However, as an adult, she now views the transition as confusing.

Samuels had these feelings, because she felt she was losing her two central male role models present in her life. These two role models were her father and her late grandfather. Although she moved to Canada with her grandmother, she moved in with her mother, who had left her when she was six months old. This change made her feel like she was losing her grandmother as well.

Samuels describes she felt pushed towards having a relationship with a woman who was supposed to be a mother to her. Unfortunately, Samuels’s mother was never a mother to her. She never felt any love from her, and the love disappeared the moment she met her.

Samuels became a victim of colorism and featurism at the hands of her mother, and it played a role in her struggles with mental health. She knew there was a mental health issue when she was eight. However, she didn’t fully realize it until she turned 46.

Anxiety was the first mental health issue Samuels experienced. She would forget where she was and what she was doing. From there, it led to confusion because she didn’t talk about her issues with anger, lack of self-love, wanting to be someone else, and thinking she wasn’t worthy enough – all of this because of the lack of a mother’s love.

Years of professional therapy and understanding that it’s normal to find help is how Samuels overcame her struggles with mental health. She also uses her passions to help deal with her mental health struggles: staying physically active, maintaining an organized space, and music are some of her passions, and the ability to self-reflect has become a life changer for her. Cleaning helps her declutter the negative thoughts she has in her head. Going to the gym helps her release feelings. The most important one will be for her to acknowledge a problem and what she can do to overcome it.

The biggest thing she has done as a mental health advocate was to put herself on a platform and showcase relatability. Through this, Samuels has shown that not everyone who suffers from mental issues has an addiction or is incapable of moving past it.

She did not have any advocacy for mental health when growing up, so Samuels advocates for individuals who are dealing with mental health challenges; something that she wished would have been done for her when she was growing up.

“I had a lot of misconceptions on what anything mental meant,” said Samuels. She said there would be a lot of negative labels and stigmas she did not want to be associated with, and upon realization that these misconceptions were false, Samuels put herself out there for others to be able to see that anything was possible, it just took working on yourself. 

“We can get through this together,” she said.

Within the Black community, there is a stigma surrounding mental health. Samuels’ advice is for people to acknowledge that if something does not feel right, to deal with the feelings that come with it. Acknowledging a problem shows courage and strength. The weakness is when one hides it and doesn’t get help.

As a mental health advocate, she enjoys giving someone the courage to share their story and relate to them. Samuels would like to do more public speaking on mental health in any setting for people of all ages. She is also in the process of piecing together her story to share with the community.

As someone who grew up in the Jane and Finch area, Samuels likes to give back and prove not everyone in the neighborhood is a criminal. Her fondest memory of being in the area was feeling a sense of community. Samuels misses how everyone knew each other and looked out for one another.

“The whole community was a family,” said Samuels, “It is not something that you witness anymore.”

Samuels would like to see the Jane and Finch community revert to how it was when she was a child.

She wants more recreational options for kids besides basketball and track and field for example: horseback riding, gymnastics, and skating. “Just something different from the norm for that neighborhood,” she said.

Samuels shared with me about the time that she lost everything and ended up at a woman’s shelter. There she met other women who experienced the same issues. They were in a situation where all they needed was some help. Despite the challenges, Samuels overcame her homelessness by accepting the help she needed. Her time in a women’s shelter is what inspired her to want to give back.

The first giveback happened in December 2021 at the Driftwood Community Centre. She raised $7,500 for: gift cards, food, and clothing. Last year’s giveback happened at the Jane and Finch Mall and raised over $12,000. Samuels also volunteers with: Seva Food Bank, Young Bosses in Business, and Peel and Toronto Police.

It is important that we as a community recognize the work of someone like Karen Samuels; it is heroines like her that keep our community together.

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Chibie Louis-Okoye – Unapologetically sharing the African experience

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By  Sydnee Walcott

In an industry where there are not too many people of colour, one empowered woman is taking the correct steps toward standing out. Chibie Louis-Okoye is a thought-provoking Nigerian Canadian film producer who has received many accolades throughout her career.

Born and raised in Nigeria, Louis-Okoye’s upbringing had its good and bad moments, but she was happy for the most part and provided with everything she needed. Her parents encouraged her and her siblings to go to school and take on a professional path that would lead to a career with a stable income and go on to have a family.

“My parents worked very hard to take us to the best schools they could take us to,” said Louis-Okoye, whose parents wanted both her and her siblings to become something great in the future. Louis-Okoye studied at the University of Windsor as an international student, where she received a Degree in Communication. Afterward, she went to Queen’s University, where she studied innovation and entrepreneurship.

Her inspiration to be a film producer came from wanting to take back the power to create worlds and stories that can influence pop culture and people’s perspectives on how they see things on subjects they don’t know. With a gap in the content of African stories, Louis-Okoye realized the industry needs producers and storytellers to help close the gap. “Producing is all about honing the business side of the creative,” said Louis-Okoye, whose goal is to centre the African diaspora on the world stage through her company COLO Studios.

What Louis-Okoye enjoys the most about producing is the transformation of raw ideas into materialized content.  Yes of course there are other elements of her work that she enjoys (hiring a team, and raising funds), but her heart remains with the creative process. She describes it as making a dream come true. “I believe a film is a tool for activism,” said Louis-Okoye. Activism, politics, spirituality, the monarchy, and the impact of colonialism are some of the thought-provoking content people can find in films and television series produced by Louis-Okoye.

Her latest film, KOFA, is inspired by how the world has moved on after kidnappings in Nigeria and surrounding areas. The film also focuses on how it remains precarious in Nigeria.  KOFA (Louis-Okoye’s favourite project to date) is a psychological thriller that deals with people being locked in a room and waking up nude with no memories.

From the beginning, the plot beckons the watcher to question every character, understand motive, and question what will happen next. With elements of betrayal and finger pointing the film keeps viewers intrigued as they watch the group try to figure out how they ended up where they were. Throughout their drama, a male character continuously enters the room and takes them out one by one. Scared for their lives, the group tries to piece together their memories.

Louis-Okoye loves those topics, because she feels the viewers can put themselves in the character’s shoes and feel their emotions and what’s at stake for them. She describes this as a human condition, because sometimes people may feel trapped. It may not feel like a physical trap in a room, but it can be a physical trap in a career they don’t love and are only doing for economic purposes. “People can feel trapped mentally as well.” Louis-Okoye shared.

KOFA won the Best Feature Film at the African International Film Festival, and received two African Magic Viewer Choice Awards nominations. The film’s trailer also received an award for the best trailer in the African region at the 2023 World Trailer Awards in Portugal.

Louis-Okoye’s current project is a television series called The Third Coming, and she’s having the time of her life on the project. The series centres around what can happen if colonialism and imperialism were to come back to Africa in the present and how that would look.

Louis-Okoye would like to see her career take her back to Africa, where she can continue to tell stories relatable to Africans and have the world look at things through that lens. She also wants to collaborate with others to help tell those stories and provide a technical process for creating a film and television series. She also wants to collaborate with the greats in Hollywood and take some of their lessons and experiences. Her dream is to have COLO Studios maintain its vision of centring the African experiences on the world stage.

As Africans living in the diaspora, we have a strong, and notable impact on this planet, and creatives like Louis-Okoye are the ones who will stamp our impact in the minds of people for generations to come.

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Women Empowered

Trisha Smith Divine Essence, Healer and Mystic; Showing up as a better version of herself every day

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Marvin Morgan

By Simone J Smith

What happened to her was a living nightmare. It’s something that no young woman should have to go through. 

As I listened to her story, I thought to myself, “She is so strong, so loving and passionate about life. If she had not told me this, I would never know.”

This is why we do it. This is why the team at Toronto Caribbean Newspaper decided over 10 years ago to share the stories of Caribbean women who have historically been marginalized and underrepresented in various forms of media, including literature, film, and television. By telling their stories, we can provide representation and visibility to a group that has often been excluded. It allows other Caribbean women to see themselves reflected in narratives and helps to challenge stereotypes and misconceptions.

This week I am happy to be sharing the story of one of our writers, a woman who I admire, and whom I strongly believe will continue to be a source of wisdom and health to the Caribbean community here in Toronto, and across the diaspora. 

Our Woman Empowered is a renowned healer, and possesses great knowledge, skills, training, experience, empathy and compassion. Her personal experience with pain has contributed to her development of empathy and understanding. By trade she is a wellness consultant, but by her soul’s decree, she is a Divine Essence, Healer and Mystic who has been charged with the task to empower, awaken and inspire those who are led to work with her. She takes a full-circle approach to healing, incorporating all aspects of health to restore not only the body, but mind and soul as well.

She offers a unique and diverse perspective that contributes to a comprehensive understanding of the human experience. Her story will inspire individuals to overcome challenges, pursue their dreams, and contribute to a positive change in our world. I would like to introduce our Woman Empowered, Trisha Smith.

“I was born and raised in Toronto and my family moved to Brampton when I was much younger. That is where I spent most of my early life. I lived with my mom and dad until I was five years old, and then my parents split up. My parents were two different energies. My mom was a Christian and my dad was more street, you know the Caribbean man; he loved his drink, he loved the street, and he loved his weed.

The split was difficult for me because from when I can remember, I was a daddy’s girl all the way. He favored me, spoiled me, and loved me. He was my everything. That was my daddy. When he left, it impacted me. We went from a six-bedroom house to a shelter with bunk beds. It was a total 360 for me. This is when life took a turn for the worse, and for a while, life didn’t make sense to me.

I will never forget the day when my mother and I returned from Jamaica, and when we came back the house was empty. My dad had sold the house and moved out. It was a very traumatic experience for me. Even at a young age, what was happening seemed off.

We were in the shelter for six months, and then moved into housing. From six until 16, I was in housing. I still saw my dad, but things were just different. I hated going to see him. Once I got older, we grew apart; I don’t know if I reminded him of her, but he became very miserable. Our visits were always him questioning me and my siblings about what my mom was doing, it wasn’t about us. 

I watched my mom slave; I saw how difficult it was for her. Even though I was younger I saw this. I hardly saw mom, and I only saw her when we were going to church. She was very protective over me; I couldn’t have a boyfriend, I couldn’t go out, I couldn’t do anything.”

Trisha’s life became very tumultuous; at a young age she began to feel intense emotional pain that left her longing for connection.

“My mom met someone, and she left us. Yep, she just got up and left, and this is when life went haywire; I started to do everything that I wasn’t supposed to do. I ended up living with my dad again, but that was short lived. One day he came to my room, threw a suitcase on the ground and told me that I was going to live in New York with my mother. I had five days to get my life together and just like that I was living in the Bronx. I finished up the 10th grade in New York.

My mom’s husband did not like me at all; I guess I disturbed their no-child home, so before I knew it, I was being sent back to Canada. I didn’t tell my dad I was coming back, instead I went to live with my sister. I think my mom felt bad, so she came back to give me some kind of stability, so I was with her after that.” 

Trisha was developing as a woman, and her feeling of abandonment triggered a deep sense of rejection. She began to feel unworthy, unimportant by the people who were supposed to love her, and this led to self-doubt and diminished self-esteem. It also made her vulnerable to predators.

“I met a Rasta, and he changed my life. I was young and foolish, and I got caught up in him. Next thing I knew I was pregnant, and this man started to beat me. The abuse got worse, and Children’s Aid got involved. It was terrible. I was getting beaten twice a week. My mom actually caught him beating me, and she called the police. He finally got deported. 

Life was rough during that time, but it was the genesis of my healing journey. I attended Dominion Herbal College when I was with him. I became a vegetarian and got extremely sick, which led to me discovering the miracle of herbs. I wanted to learn more about my body, so I went to the Canadian School of Natural Medicine and graduated as a nutritionist. I found passion in holistic medicine.

One day my friend invited me to a fire ritual, and this is when everything changed. I learned about my ancestors, how to interact with nature, and learned about the elements. It opened up my eyes to more. I started to get more into African spirituality, and healing. When I met Malidoma, he taught me how to have a more intimate relationship with nature and then I began creating my own concoctions. This is how Adero Herbals was born. I vended all over the city for 10 years, conducted workshops and helped many women through my nutritional consultations.” 

Her second evolution was in Las Vegas when she went to a workshop seminar led by Dr Mitchell Gibson, and his wife Kathy Gibson (Solar Rejuvenation). 

“He gave us practices that involved rituals around the sun. He spoke about evolution, the soul, the spirit, and how we interact with the spirit world. It was level up for me. I came home and I couldn’t do the rituals, and this upset me. I wanted a way out of the life that I had created. I stopped smoking weed and began to focus on my healing.

I decided to go back to school. I went to Humber College and got my Marketing Diploma, and I started writing. I had always been a writer; it was in me. I started sharing stories in Reggae Exclusive, and other publications. I revamped my business to Sakred Synergi and introduced a new line of tonics and began doing guided meditations and writing eBooks all centered around mental health and women’s health. I am proud to say that I also got my certifications in Reiki and Life Coaching. 

My healing journey is still a process and has me working on a shadow work course where I will teach women in a step by step process how to heal from trauma and pain. 

I love water in all its forms, deep walks off the trail in the forest, metaphysics, jazz and reggae music, clubs and comedy. Yes! This Gemini embraces her dual nature, and I am always down for adventure and trying new things! Drag racing is next on my list!

My four children keep me on my toes and challenge me to show up as a better version of myself every day.” 

http://www.sakredsynergi.com/

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