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Women Empowered

Sashagai Ruddock – Changing the narrative of a big girl in a big world

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BY JANIECE CAMPBELL

“People will say that you aren’t perfect. We were all made exactly how we were supposed to be, so I don’t understand how we couldn’t be perfect.” Sashagai Ruddock

In a world full of detox teas, weight loss supplements and waist trainers, plus-sized women tend to feel out of place. With social media flooded with stereotypically attractive women, it isn’t uncommon for many to struggle with identity issues. In today’s superficial society, conventional beauty standards are no match for “Toronto’s Fluffy.”

She has many titles under her belt. Entrepreneur. Fashion blogger. Body-positive influencer. Self-love coach.

In the age of social media likes becoming a form of validation, Sasha strives to assure people of their importance and perfection. “I like to see the change, that lightbulb moment when they realize, woah! I’m worth it. I’m attractive. I’m gorgeous. I’m beautiful. I’m sexy.”

Unapologetically embracing her beauty, Sasha had experienced bullying like many others growing up. Though unlike most, she held her head high and chose not to let that phase her.

Around twelve years ago was when it all started.

Her online presence began with her original blog, Deliciously Fat. She had many ambitions and decided that she needed to rebrand into something bigger and better. “I remember hearing quotes of people saying how nobody wants to see plus-sized women on the runway and how women want to see what they want to be, not what they are. I remember that sitting with me. I couldn’t believe there were people like that in the media.”

Thus, while sitting in her Brampton kitchen, the handle @flawsofcouture was born.

“I was going through possible names and thinking, okay, they think that we’re flawed people and that’s why we don’t deserve to be on the runway. Runways are made for couture and couture is made for a certain kind of body… but that shouldn’t be true. If you’re a designer, you should be able to make clothes for everyone. The average size of a woman in Canada and America is about a 16-18. How is it that you’re overlooking the majority of women and saying that they don’t belong?”

She continues.

“Since they think we’re flawed, then I’ll represent the flaws of couture. I came up with the name, thinking it would just be a light and fluffy name for the blog. But over ten years later, it’s much more than that.”

Born in Canada to Jamaican parents, Sasha would be incomplete without the love of her family. Blessed to be raised by loving and supporting parents, she says they are her “goal, reason, and why.” With her parents still working, she says she will not rest until they can.

A quick scroll through her Instagram page will show you that this woman’s fashion is fearless. With a wide range of colourful outfits and hairstyles to pair with, it’s no wonder she got partnerships with reputable brands like FashionNova and ASOS. As a family-oriented individual, it only made sense that her first fashion inspiration came from none other than her father.

“I definitely get it from my dad. He was the first fashion icon I’d ever seen. Until this day, he can out dress anybody! He’s the sharpest man I’ve ever come across.”

Her love for fashion brought her to be the founder of her own brand, FOC Apparel, an inclusive clothing line ranging from sizes small to 5X. Presenting streetwear clothing, this brand goes against the typical attire for curvy girls.

“When I was younger, I was bigger than a lot of my friends. I would always wear long-sleeves and cover up or want to put a t-shirt on in the pool. I know what that life was like and seeing so many girls live that life today. I just want to free them! FOC Apparel is a way of freeing them from that version of themselves and allowing them to realize that their bodies are beautiful. They should be able to show it off just the same.”

A clothing line that is absolutely not for the faint of heart, she offers several variations of bikinis, bandeaus, cropped sweaters and shirts.

“We don’t want to dress like grandparents! It’s insane to me that in 2020, people still think that plus-sized women need to be covered up. This line is for the girl who’s ready to let go of people’s opinions and embrace her body.”

 Along with her outstanding fashion brand, Sasha is co-founder of Nu Ave Nails, a pop-up nail shop and training school featuring all black nail technicians. She, along with her business partner, noticed a worldwide trend of black women being treated terribly in non-black owned salons.

“Black women are always doing long, inventive nails and dropping cash – there is no other race that spends as much money as black women in nail salons. Yet, we’re disrespected on the highest regard. Why should we continue to subject ourselves to this kind of treatment when we’re the ones who carry the power? So, we created a shop, took appointments and wined and dined the ladies, as they should be.”

While promoting the importance of loving yourself, Sasha also uses her platform as a safe space for open dialogue surrounding relationships and sexual health. With segments like #HealthyHoe and #LiveAfterDark, she encourages tough conversations that society does not have enough of.

“I feel like women should be liberated and happy to have sex. It should be okay and open to speak about sex. It’s the way to be the healthiest version of yourself.”

As she enters her 30s, Sashagai Ruddock is only just getting started. Being the voice for those who are too timid, she wholly represents what it is to be confident and continues to be an inspiration for many. She aspires to live her best life with zero regrets.

“My advice for people is to free yourself from people’s opinions. I want to live a life where I can look back and say “I did everything! I was serving looks, I was feeling myself, skin was glowing, fupa and all.”

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Fifidi

    October 13, 2020 at 10:43 am

    it really opened me up after listening to your interview on CBC october 12.

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Women Empowered

Karen Samuels Giving the community the courage to share their stories

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By Sydnee Walcott

While killing two birds with one stone is challenging for some, one woman is defying those odds. 

Karen Samuels moved to Canada from Jamaica at the age of three. At a young age, it wouldn’t have been easy for her to describe the transition from one country to another. However, as an adult, she now views the transition as confusing.

Samuels had these feelings, because she felt she was losing her two central male role models present in her life. These two role models were her father and her late grandfather. Although she moved to Canada with her grandmother, she moved in with her mother, who had left her when she was six months old. This change made her feel like she was losing her grandmother as well.

Samuels describes she felt pushed towards having a relationship with a woman who was supposed to be a mother to her. Unfortunately, Samuels’s mother was never a mother to her. She never felt any love from her, and the love disappeared the moment she met her.

Samuels became a victim of colorism and featurism at the hands of her mother, and it played a role in her struggles with mental health. She knew there was a mental health issue when she was eight. However, she didn’t fully realize it until she turned 46.

Anxiety was the first mental health issue Samuels experienced. She would forget where she was and what she was doing. From there, it led to confusion because she didn’t talk about her issues with anger, lack of self-love, wanting to be someone else, and thinking she wasn’t worthy enough – all of this because of the lack of a mother’s love.

Years of professional therapy and understanding that it’s normal to find help is how Samuels overcame her struggles with mental health. She also uses her passions to help deal with her mental health struggles: staying physically active, maintaining an organized space, and music are some of her passions, and the ability to self-reflect has become a life changer for her. Cleaning helps her declutter the negative thoughts she has in her head. Going to the gym helps her release feelings. The most important one will be for her to acknowledge a problem and what she can do to overcome it.

The biggest thing she has done as a mental health advocate was to put herself on a platform and showcase relatability. Through this, Samuels has shown that not everyone who suffers from mental issues has an addiction or is incapable of moving past it.

She did not have any advocacy for mental health when growing up, so Samuels advocates for individuals who are dealing with mental health challenges; something that she wished would have been done for her when she was growing up.

“I had a lot of misconceptions on what anything mental meant,” said Samuels. She said there would be a lot of negative labels and stigmas she did not want to be associated with, and upon realization that these misconceptions were false, Samuels put herself out there for others to be able to see that anything was possible, it just took working on yourself. 

“We can get through this together,” she said.

Within the Black community, there is a stigma surrounding mental health. Samuels’ advice is for people to acknowledge that if something does not feel right, to deal with the feelings that come with it. Acknowledging a problem shows courage and strength. The weakness is when one hides it and doesn’t get help.

As a mental health advocate, she enjoys giving someone the courage to share their story and relate to them. Samuels would like to do more public speaking on mental health in any setting for people of all ages. She is also in the process of piecing together her story to share with the community.

As someone who grew up in the Jane and Finch area, Samuels likes to give back and prove not everyone in the neighborhood is a criminal. Her fondest memory of being in the area was feeling a sense of community. Samuels misses how everyone knew each other and looked out for one another.

“The whole community was a family,” said Samuels, “It is not something that you witness anymore.”

Samuels would like to see the Jane and Finch community revert to how it was when she was a child.

She wants more recreational options for kids besides basketball and track and field for example: horseback riding, gymnastics, and skating. “Just something different from the norm for that neighborhood,” she said.

Samuels shared with me about the time that she lost everything and ended up at a woman’s shelter. There she met other women who experienced the same issues. They were in a situation where all they needed was some help. Despite the challenges, Samuels overcame her homelessness by accepting the help she needed. Her time in a women’s shelter is what inspired her to want to give back.

The first giveback happened in December 2021 at the Driftwood Community Centre. She raised $7,500 for: gift cards, food, and clothing. Last year’s giveback happened at the Jane and Finch Mall and raised over $12,000. Samuels also volunteers with: Seva Food Bank, Young Bosses in Business, and Peel and Toronto Police.

It is important that we as a community recognize the work of someone like Karen Samuels; it is heroines like her that keep our community together.

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Chibie Louis-Okoye – Unapologetically sharing the African experience

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By  Sydnee Walcott

In an industry where there are not too many people of colour, one empowered woman is taking the correct steps toward standing out. Chibie Louis-Okoye is a thought-provoking Nigerian Canadian film producer who has received many accolades throughout her career.

Born and raised in Nigeria, Louis-Okoye’s upbringing had its good and bad moments, but she was happy for the most part and provided with everything she needed. Her parents encouraged her and her siblings to go to school and take on a professional path that would lead to a career with a stable income and go on to have a family.

“My parents worked very hard to take us to the best schools they could take us to,” said Louis-Okoye, whose parents wanted both her and her siblings to become something great in the future. Louis-Okoye studied at the University of Windsor as an international student, where she received a Degree in Communication. Afterward, she went to Queen’s University, where she studied innovation and entrepreneurship.

Her inspiration to be a film producer came from wanting to take back the power to create worlds and stories that can influence pop culture and people’s perspectives on how they see things on subjects they don’t know. With a gap in the content of African stories, Louis-Okoye realized the industry needs producers and storytellers to help close the gap. “Producing is all about honing the business side of the creative,” said Louis-Okoye, whose goal is to centre the African diaspora on the world stage through her company COLO Studios.

What Louis-Okoye enjoys the most about producing is the transformation of raw ideas into materialized content.  Yes of course there are other elements of her work that she enjoys (hiring a team, and raising funds), but her heart remains with the creative process. She describes it as making a dream come true. “I believe a film is a tool for activism,” said Louis-Okoye. Activism, politics, spirituality, the monarchy, and the impact of colonialism are some of the thought-provoking content people can find in films and television series produced by Louis-Okoye.

Her latest film, KOFA, is inspired by how the world has moved on after kidnappings in Nigeria and surrounding areas. The film also focuses on how it remains precarious in Nigeria.  KOFA (Louis-Okoye’s favourite project to date) is a psychological thriller that deals with people being locked in a room and waking up nude with no memories.

From the beginning, the plot beckons the watcher to question every character, understand motive, and question what will happen next. With elements of betrayal and finger pointing the film keeps viewers intrigued as they watch the group try to figure out how they ended up where they were. Throughout their drama, a male character continuously enters the room and takes them out one by one. Scared for their lives, the group tries to piece together their memories.

Louis-Okoye loves those topics, because she feels the viewers can put themselves in the character’s shoes and feel their emotions and what’s at stake for them. She describes this as a human condition, because sometimes people may feel trapped. It may not feel like a physical trap in a room, but it can be a physical trap in a career they don’t love and are only doing for economic purposes. “People can feel trapped mentally as well.” Louis-Okoye shared.

KOFA won the Best Feature Film at the African International Film Festival, and received two African Magic Viewer Choice Awards nominations. The film’s trailer also received an award for the best trailer in the African region at the 2023 World Trailer Awards in Portugal.

Louis-Okoye’s current project is a television series called The Third Coming, and she’s having the time of her life on the project. The series centres around what can happen if colonialism and imperialism were to come back to Africa in the present and how that would look.

Louis-Okoye would like to see her career take her back to Africa, where she can continue to tell stories relatable to Africans and have the world look at things through that lens. She also wants to collaborate with others to help tell those stories and provide a technical process for creating a film and television series. She also wants to collaborate with the greats in Hollywood and take some of their lessons and experiences. Her dream is to have COLO Studios maintain its vision of centring the African experiences on the world stage.

As Africans living in the diaspora, we have a strong, and notable impact on this planet, and creatives like Louis-Okoye are the ones who will stamp our impact in the minds of people for generations to come.

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Women Empowered

Trisha Smith Divine Essence, Healer and Mystic; Showing up as a better version of herself every day

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Marvin Morgan

By Simone J Smith

What happened to her was a living nightmare. It’s something that no young woman should have to go through. 

As I listened to her story, I thought to myself, “She is so strong, so loving and passionate about life. If she had not told me this, I would never know.”

This is why we do it. This is why the team at Toronto Caribbean Newspaper decided over 10 years ago to share the stories of Caribbean women who have historically been marginalized and underrepresented in various forms of media, including literature, film, and television. By telling their stories, we can provide representation and visibility to a group that has often been excluded. It allows other Caribbean women to see themselves reflected in narratives and helps to challenge stereotypes and misconceptions.

This week I am happy to be sharing the story of one of our writers, a woman who I admire, and whom I strongly believe will continue to be a source of wisdom and health to the Caribbean community here in Toronto, and across the diaspora. 

Our Woman Empowered is a renowned healer, and possesses great knowledge, skills, training, experience, empathy and compassion. Her personal experience with pain has contributed to her development of empathy and understanding. By trade she is a wellness consultant, but by her soul’s decree, she is a Divine Essence, Healer and Mystic who has been charged with the task to empower, awaken and inspire those who are led to work with her. She takes a full-circle approach to healing, incorporating all aspects of health to restore not only the body, but mind and soul as well.

She offers a unique and diverse perspective that contributes to a comprehensive understanding of the human experience. Her story will inspire individuals to overcome challenges, pursue their dreams, and contribute to a positive change in our world. I would like to introduce our Woman Empowered, Trisha Smith.

“I was born and raised in Toronto and my family moved to Brampton when I was much younger. That is where I spent most of my early life. I lived with my mom and dad until I was five years old, and then my parents split up. My parents were two different energies. My mom was a Christian and my dad was more street, you know the Caribbean man; he loved his drink, he loved the street, and he loved his weed.

The split was difficult for me because from when I can remember, I was a daddy’s girl all the way. He favored me, spoiled me, and loved me. He was my everything. That was my daddy. When he left, it impacted me. We went from a six-bedroom house to a shelter with bunk beds. It was a total 360 for me. This is when life took a turn for the worse, and for a while, life didn’t make sense to me.

I will never forget the day when my mother and I returned from Jamaica, and when we came back the house was empty. My dad had sold the house and moved out. It was a very traumatic experience for me. Even at a young age, what was happening seemed off.

We were in the shelter for six months, and then moved into housing. From six until 16, I was in housing. I still saw my dad, but things were just different. I hated going to see him. Once I got older, we grew apart; I don’t know if I reminded him of her, but he became very miserable. Our visits were always him questioning me and my siblings about what my mom was doing, it wasn’t about us. 

I watched my mom slave; I saw how difficult it was for her. Even though I was younger I saw this. I hardly saw mom, and I only saw her when we were going to church. She was very protective over me; I couldn’t have a boyfriend, I couldn’t go out, I couldn’t do anything.”

Trisha’s life became very tumultuous; at a young age she began to feel intense emotional pain that left her longing for connection.

“My mom met someone, and she left us. Yep, she just got up and left, and this is when life went haywire; I started to do everything that I wasn’t supposed to do. I ended up living with my dad again, but that was short lived. One day he came to my room, threw a suitcase on the ground and told me that I was going to live in New York with my mother. I had five days to get my life together and just like that I was living in the Bronx. I finished up the 10th grade in New York.

My mom’s husband did not like me at all; I guess I disturbed their no-child home, so before I knew it, I was being sent back to Canada. I didn’t tell my dad I was coming back, instead I went to live with my sister. I think my mom felt bad, so she came back to give me some kind of stability, so I was with her after that.” 

Trisha was developing as a woman, and her feeling of abandonment triggered a deep sense of rejection. She began to feel unworthy, unimportant by the people who were supposed to love her, and this led to self-doubt and diminished self-esteem. It also made her vulnerable to predators.

“I met a Rasta, and he changed my life. I was young and foolish, and I got caught up in him. Next thing I knew I was pregnant, and this man started to beat me. The abuse got worse, and Children’s Aid got involved. It was terrible. I was getting beaten twice a week. My mom actually caught him beating me, and she called the police. He finally got deported. 

Life was rough during that time, but it was the genesis of my healing journey. I attended Dominion Herbal College when I was with him. I became a vegetarian and got extremely sick, which led to me discovering the miracle of herbs. I wanted to learn more about my body, so I went to the Canadian School of Natural Medicine and graduated as a nutritionist. I found passion in holistic medicine.

One day my friend invited me to a fire ritual, and this is when everything changed. I learned about my ancestors, how to interact with nature, and learned about the elements. It opened up my eyes to more. I started to get more into African spirituality, and healing. When I met Malidoma, he taught me how to have a more intimate relationship with nature and then I began creating my own concoctions. This is how Adero Herbals was born. I vended all over the city for 10 years, conducted workshops and helped many women through my nutritional consultations.” 

Her second evolution was in Las Vegas when she went to a workshop seminar led by Dr Mitchell Gibson, and his wife Kathy Gibson (Solar Rejuvenation). 

“He gave us practices that involved rituals around the sun. He spoke about evolution, the soul, the spirit, and how we interact with the spirit world. It was level up for me. I came home and I couldn’t do the rituals, and this upset me. I wanted a way out of the life that I had created. I stopped smoking weed and began to focus on my healing.

I decided to go back to school. I went to Humber College and got my Marketing Diploma, and I started writing. I had always been a writer; it was in me. I started sharing stories in Reggae Exclusive, and other publications. I revamped my business to Sakred Synergi and introduced a new line of tonics and began doing guided meditations and writing eBooks all centered around mental health and women’s health. I am proud to say that I also got my certifications in Reiki and Life Coaching. 

My healing journey is still a process and has me working on a shadow work course where I will teach women in a step by step process how to heal from trauma and pain. 

I love water in all its forms, deep walks off the trail in the forest, metaphysics, jazz and reggae music, clubs and comedy. Yes! This Gemini embraces her dual nature, and I am always down for adventure and trying new things! Drag racing is next on my list!

My four children keep me on my toes and challenge me to show up as a better version of myself every day.” 

http://www.sakredsynergi.com/

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