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Trust, faith, and the cost of kindness for members in the Black Church

“The corporate world taught me: document, don’t debate.”

Photo Courtesy of: Lisa Thompson

In a candid interview, Dalston Spencer shared a sobering account of how faith, trust, and professional image can sometimes collide in painful ways. “I accepted her as credible without doing my own due diligence,” he admitted. “I relied on others’ recommendations; that was a hard lesson. As President Ronald Reagan once said, ‘Trust but verify.’”

Spencer explained that his decision to engage in a financial transaction with a woman introduced through church circles was guided largely by faith and compassion. “About seventy percent of my decision came from my Christian values, the good Samaritan mindset,” he said. “The other thirty percent was from seeing her in our community, doing professional presentations. I believed her words.”

That belief, however, led to disappointment. “I sent her a large sum of money and had to go to court to get repaid,” Spencer recalled. Before the case reached court, she told him, ‘I thought I was dealing with a Christian, not a businessperson.’

Spencer’s response was clear, “I am both. I’m a licensed mortgage broker. I live by faith, but I also work in the corporate world. You must stay alert, battle-tested, and ready, because in shark-infested waters, not every red snapper is your friend.”

Continuing our interview, Dalston Spencer cited the biblical verse Matthew 5:39  “turn the other cheek” but added, “I only have two cheeks.” His remark underscored a new awareness born from another hard lesson, this time involving a tenant rather than an investor.

Spencer and his wife decided to rent out their basement after their adult children moved out. “We listed it in the local paper, and someone responded,” he recalled. “He mentioned that my wife had worked with his close friend, and she could vouch for him.” Relying again on trust and community reference, Spencer entered into a tenancy that would later test his patience and faith.

What began as a simple rental turned into a battle of boundaries. “He acted as though he was the landlord,” Spencer explained. “When tradespeople came for repairs, he told me I wasn’t allowed to enter the basement.” Recognizing the tenant’s familiarity with the Landlord and Tenant Tribunal, Spencer documented every exchange; photos, notes, and monthly receipts stamped ‘Refused to Accept’.

“I didn’t react emotionally,” Spencer concluded. “I followed procedure and let the evidence speak. The corporate world taught me: document, don’t debate.”

Reflecting further, Dalston Spencer explained how both the failed investment and the rental dispute forced him to reassess his approach to trust and generosity. “I provided all the documents to show that I had lent money under a proper agreement,” he said. “She delayed and delayed, hoping my wife and I would become frustrated and simply walk away.”

When asked if he began questioning his role in helping others within his community, Spencer admitted, “Yes. Those experiences made me more alert and cautious. I learned the importance of doing my own due diligence instead of relying on others’ words or appearance.”

After both cases were finally settled, another opportunity appeared less than a year later; someone approached him again with a new investment and rental proposal. This time, Spencer was prepared. “I’ve learned to put my faith more in God, not in people,” he said firmly. “We now protect our security and our family. We’ve agreed, no more rentals, no more lending money. We’re not a bank.”

Spencer emphasized that compassion remains a part of his values, but now with clear limits: “If someone needs help, we’ll pray for them or guide them, but we won’t hand over our savings.”

As our interview drew to a close, Dalston Spencer spoke candidly about how his faith and approach to life have evolved after being twice tested by deception. Known publicly as a man of faith and integrity, Spencer admitted that his kindness once made him a target for “Wolves in sheep’s clothing.”

“How do I protect myself now?” he said. “If I’m in doubt, my first call is to my legal professional. That’s my number two, but my number one is God.” He paused, then added, “The major key to my better future is to trust God and leave the consequences to Him.”

Spencer no longer acts on emotion or reputation alone. “Before, I trusted people because of their position, or the word of others. Now, I take everything to God in prayer. I won’t move or decide until I receive divine revelation and peace about the direction.”

His closing words carried a powerful message, one that resonates with anyone torn between faith and justice, “Legal fairness can protect your rights, but divine faith protects your peace. When you’re kind and vulnerable, let God be your first counsel, and let the law handle the rest.”

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