BY SIMONE J. SMITH
The aroma of freshly brewed coffee fills the air. A concerned mother in her 40s, is preparing breakfast. Her teenage son enters the room with a heavy expression.
“Morning, sweetheart. How did you sleep?” Avoiding eye contact, the son says, “Fine, I guess.”
The mother studies him for a moment, noticing the dark circles under his eyes and his slouched posture. “You guess? You look tired. Are you sure everything’s alright?” The son mumbles “Yeah, just school stuff.’
The mother places a plate of pancakes in front of her son and sits across from him. She watches as he picks at his food, barely eating. “You’ve been really quiet lately. Is there something you want to talk about?” “No, not really,” the son replies.
The mother has frustration and worry etched on her face. She reaches out, gently touching her son’s hand. “Remember, you don’t have to go through things alone. I’m always here for you.” Her son gets up and grabs his backpack, “I gotta go. I’m gonna be late.”
The mother watches her son leave, her heart heavy with worry. She takes a deep breath, determined to find a way to reach out to her son.
The fast pace of today’s world significantly impacts teens, often leading to increased stress and anxiety. Constant connectivity through social media and digital devices exposes them to a barrage of information and peer comparisons, which can affect their self-esteem and mental health.
The pressure to excel academically and socially, coupled with the rapid technological advancements, overwhelms their still-developing brains. This relentless pace leaves less time for relaxation and face-to-face interactions, potentially hindering their emotional and social development. Consequently, teens may struggle with balancing their responsibilities and maintaining their well-being in such a fast-paced environment.
The COVID-19 pandemic amplified their struggles with mental health, education, and social development. There was this sudden shift to remote learning, which disrupted their academic progress and widened the achievement gap, especially for those lacking access to reliable technology. Many faced isolation from peers, and this led to increased feelings of loneliness and anxiety, indirectly exacerbating pre-existing mental health issues. The cancellation of extracurricular activities, and milestone events, like graduations and proms, deprived teens of crucial social experiences essential for their emotional and psychological growth.
The only thing is that distinguishing between so-called “typical” teen behavior and signs of emerging mental health disorders can be especially difficult, especially for parents who have their own set of issues, yet experts stress that understanding these distinctions is critical when it comes to guiding teens to effective treatment for mental health conditions.
So how can parents, educators, and other adults learn to identify the symptoms of common mental health disorders in teens? When is the right time to explore professional help, and what are the best treatment approaches for adolescents?
I had a chance to sit in on a webinar with Dr. Perihan Esra Guvenek-Cokol, and during the webinar, she shared tips for “Spotting the Onset of Adolescent Mental Health Conditions.”
Increase in mental health issues with children
As many of us might remember, during adolescence, brain development undergoes significant changes, marked by the maturation of the prefrontal cortex (responsible for decision-making, impulse control, and reasoning, which continues to develop, leading to improved cognitive abilities and executive functions), and an increase in synaptic pruning. Synaptic pruning eliminates excess neural connections, enhancing the efficiency of brain networks. This period is characterized by heightened neuroplasticity (brain flexibility), making the adolescent brain particularly adaptable, yet also more vulnerable to environmental influences and stress. These neural (brain) transformations contribute to the complex: emotional, social, and cognitive growth observed during adolescence.
What does this all mean? There is a lot going on with teens, and for parents, this can be incredibly challenging, especially when you feel disconnected from your child. However, please don’t worry—there are many effective ways to reach and understand them. Below are some important tips to consider in your journey to reconnect with your child.
- Try to understand why they might be utilizing drugs (smoking weed). Usually this could be because they have a source of anxiety (moving to a new place, making new friends, being bullied, being cyberbullied).
- Empower your teens because they need to feel like they are in control. Don’t try to solve their problems for them; instead provide them with the tools they may need, and then step back and just be supportive.
- Ask your teenager how they would like to handle a problem and hear them out. Use phrases like, “Help me understand,” or “Tell me more.”
- Ask for permission to share your opinion. Some parents may feel entitled to their opinions when they are instructing a child. Sorry parents: this is one time in their lives that they don’t want to hear what their parents have to say.
- Your parenting style may not fit your child’s personality, but that does not make you a bad parent. It just means that you need tips and tricks to work with that child.
By keeping open lines of communication, showing empathy, and spending quality time with your teenager, you can bridge any gaps and strengthen your bond. It is a tough time for them, and a tough time for you, so give them grace, and while you are at it, give yourself grace as well. Unfortunately, teenagers do not come with a manual.
