BY STEVEN KASZAB
The Washington Post (May 29th) just published an article “In The Name Of God, Aboriginal Youth Endured Sexual Abuse for Years.” Well, no doubt it is a fact, and those who allowed this abuse to happen should have been brought before the courts, charged with a multitude of crimes, but many have escaped this justifiable retribution to stay free and possibly abuse again.
I don’t like the labels we put onto our fellow citizens: Aboriginal, Black, White, Latino. Abuse is simply something that happens on a daily basis and our justice system seems unable to end its growth and pervasiveness. Sending many abusers to prison only allows them to either continue their abuse there or be abused by fellow inmates.
I once ministered to a high security prison in the USA, finding men who had done horrible things to others. One fellow was famous for having raped and abused over 150 girls, women and boys. The chap was not very intelligent, but as foxy as they came, ready to show his territorial ambition, using his fame to incite fear in others, including the prison guards. After conversation upon conversation, I realized this person should never leave the prison, never be free again, for his very nature, his only desire was to re-offend. “It is like a dose of heroin, building up to the act, having forceful desire rushing through my veins.” Some people are mentally ill, and humanly evil too.
When we label an abuser and abuse, we take away something, something immediately important. Labeling these people creates division within our greater community. People think it is essential to point out natives were abused, but so to every ethnic group within our community. Our society has to realize that labels distort our perception of reality, dividing what we should surely be trying to unite.
If you do harm to another, a cycle of negativity will move from person to person, like a virus, something we should all be familiar with. Ever wonder why little John’s dad beats on his wife and family? Perhaps he is a horrible a*hole, or he was abused as a child. Most thugs, bullies and abusers know about victimhood, because they were victims themselves. Not an excuse mind you! When you look at a person, see their appearance, their facial and body expressions, but also know where they’re from, their culture and faith, their personal history. That is what a good policeman would do. Know who, where and why before judging.
I was sexually abused by a family member while I travelled to Europe. A child of eight, I did not know why and what he was doing, but knew it hurt and was weird to me. It took many years for me to de-internalize these feelings and try to understand them.
Victims see themselves differently than most other people. They can become defensive, socially hidden, forever angry, full of fear so strong that it can socially and personally paralyze someone.
The Washington Post article pointed out the victimhood of many thousands of Aboriginals. The result of such an article may be societal attention centering upon one particular group when in fact abuse needs to be dealt with as a social whole. Some things are wrong, and some things are right. Abuse is unacceptably wrong. Trying to deal with this issue by throwing money at it as governments often do will not solve the fact that some people are horrible and should not be in a civilized society while they are in the state they are in. Putting them in prison, but not helping them break the hold of their inner demons is criminal and will propagate further violence.
Society is challenged with the question of privacy and personal rights. If someone is mentally ill, a possible threat to another, or knows someone who is, but will not tell, what to do? There is a crime present, but family and social attitudes often protect the violators of the innocent. Mine did.
Unity of purpose is needed for society to be able to end most any social issue, be it: homelessness, poverty, or abuse. Oh yah, rape is rape. Not saying it, takes away from the horrible violation that has happened. I understand why our establishment calls rape, abuse. Labels can be uncomfortable right. People hurt others, no matter their label. That is the problem we need to deal with, not whom, but what and why?
